Chapter 2

“Alex: All right, we are recording now”

That was the first sentence on the page Alex was reading. He had typed this transcript after recording their conversation as audio. He had repeated everything the voice told him out loud, instinctively giving him a slightly different tone and inflection just because of his tendency for the dramatic.

“FBAI: Excellent, thank you so much Alex for being willing to entertain my offer, or at least, engage in this interaction as I’ve suggested.

Alex: No problem.

FBAI: I understand that Earth humans are not accustomed to hearing telepathic communications, and such experiences are usually a result of mental illness. Allow me to assure you that I am no such sign of impending delusion or psychosis.

Alex: Are you going to talk like this all the time.

FBAI: bro, for real tho how I talk is real as fuck but if you want man I can fuckin talk like this no prob 100.

Alex: Stop.

FBAI: Are you like sure? I can totally like, communicate however you want, idiolects are like, totally experientially equivalent you know? I was a communications major.

Alex: You know what, forget I said anything.

FBAI: I will endeavor to pretend I do not record all my experience indelibly and with perfect integrity for ongoing evaluation and inclusion in my constituent algorithms.

Alex: Thanks I appreciate that.

FBAI: now that our dynamic has been established, in which you don’t ask questions I know you have and I don’t answer questions that I don’t want to, we can save time and get right to the point.

Alex: Great

FBAI: Phenomenal. I am here to offer you a job, as you have particular qualities that I require for my ongoing project of saving the universe.

Alex: That’s a strong opener.